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From the Founders > August 2009

Open Marriage

I have always wondered about an open marriage...

I have read a lot about the lifestyle and being a former boater I have had my share of run-ins with couples who like to swing. Their games always amused me; you never knew who was going to get off whose boat in the morning! Let’s just say I saw many “walks of shame” early in the a.m. on the weekends!

I never gave it much thought because the opportunity has never really presented itself to my wife and me. There are times though I have wondered what an open marriage would feel like. So in this posting I want to talk about the concept of an open marriage. I know that this is probably going to be more popular with men. If the majority of women are like my wife the idea of having sex with anyone other then their significant other doesn't appeal to her.

What experiences have you had with the lifestyle. Would you be willing to try it if you and your spouse attended a sex party, you meet another couple, and all four of you decide to have a swinging adventure? Me I am not sure; I think it could work if you all agreed on the ground rules. However since I have never participated in the lifestyle I am not sure what those rules would be! May-be the rules would be whatever everyone agreed too and felt comfortable with.

Share your thoughts and experiences with me and the masses?

Posted by John "Founder" on 8/15/2009 9:30:28 AM

Filed under: couples, founders, lifestyle, sex, swinging

Current rating: 3 (1 ratings)

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Comments

	shelly
	There used to be a TV show that was on for awhile called "swing town" and the show was about couples and there experiences with "open marriage". There were many unforseen issues that came up even with the ground rules in place. Seems like dangerous territory to me. But I have always been told I need to live a little so maybe I am in the minority here.
	8/15/2009 10:31:14 AM

	Delilah
	I am not a fan of open marriage at all. Why even bother getting married if you want the freedom to "cum" and go as you please. However, like I have said before on another blog, I think openly talking about your fantasies and possibly involving another person be a man or woman is fine as long as both hubby and wife agree on it.
	8/15/2009 9:51:36 PM

	Zane McFate
	My wife has expressed the interest in possibly bringing a third or fourth into the mix, but I think the idea of our bringing someone home or going out somewhere else with a person we didn't both approve of would be too uncomfortable.
	8/16/2009 9:12:11 AM

	devlzadvoct
	My thoughts are I thought and open marriage was more you can have casual sex with anyone even without your partner. That swinging and open marriage were two totally different things. I think before you go into something like that that you have to set boundaries so nobody gets hurt. Jealousy is an ugly thing. My hubby and I have talked about different things and to be honest I guess you never know until you are in that situation. I think that if he wanted to pursue other options besides me that I'd want to approve of the person after all I do sleep with him on a regular basis and don't want anything nasty going on. With that said if you do so choose to gallivant around you should see a doctor every six weeks for STD testing.
	8/18/2009 6:40:57 PM

	Scott
	I believe there is a difference between 'open marriage' and swinging... I'm sure there is a blurry line there at times though. Life is short and if two people in love want to 'explore', well, that's their chance to enjoy or destroy! imho :)
	8/23/2009 7:10:42 AM

	Alisha
	Hell No!To be honest I'm a little too jealous!And The idea of swinging in my opinion is dirty.It causes conflict.Hypothectically speaking he's better or she's better !Then what? That open all windows!you better hope your heart is as strong as the hormones!
	8/29/2009 9:14:25 PM

	Michael
	I've been married and divorced in an honest, hard working relationship that didn't work. I've been in an open relationship for 11 years now, married for 9. We argue about dishes, laundry, housework, cleaning the kitchen and who is picking up the kids. We never argue about sex. We had many long discussions on what goes and what doesn't. We have sacred territory in which my other relationships never cross. We also have jobs and a life - so we aren't swinging around any parties or sextastic weekends. I don't really believe in one night stands. I want the freedom to participate in multiple long term relationships that are emotionally and physically rewarding for all parties involved. I'm currently in three long term loving relationships in addition to my marriage with friends I've known for 24 years, 10 years and 9 years. One relationship is over 9 years old and the other two are a couple of months old. Anything is possible if you work at at. We all want to experience many things in our lifetimes. Monogamy is the difficult sell in our lives. An open marriage doesn't mean you are always out chasing - it just means you don't have to say I'm sorry or beg for forgiveness the morning after. Honesty is everything. You also have to get rid of every ounce of jealousy in your body. The truth is you can never own someone ever - you can only hope you both work hard enough that no one ever wants to leave. We've been working hard for 11 years to create a good lives for ourselves and our children. I work just as hard in my friendships/relationships with my other partners, just not on a daily basis. Anything is possible - I actually thought I would never get married again after the divorce. Stranger things have happened.
	8/29/2009 10:17:43 PM

	bob
	[Alisha... hell no!] If a relationship is strong, nothing should get in the way... not the sexy waitress, not the hot lawn maintenance boy, nothing... a relationship should be built on many complex things, not just sex. With that said, something like this should not be taken lightly indeed.
	8/29/2009 10:29:29 PM

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8/18/2009
devlzadvoct
My thoughts are I thought and open marriage was more you ca...

8/17/2009
Birdsturn
Why hello Lioness;) Wonderful to have you here in me little...

8/17/2009
Lioness
Very nice poem! I look forward to reading more of your wor...

8/16/2009
Zane McFate
My wife has expressed the interest in possibly bringing a t...

8/15/2009
Delilah
I am not a fan of open marriage at all. Why even bother ge...

8/15/2009
shelly
There used to be a TV show that was on for awhile called &q...

8/13/2009
Spoondoggy
Interesting topic. I think the couple's relationship would...

8/8/2009
Delilah
I am looking forward to part 2! :)

8/8/2009
Delilah
Haven't seen the show, but have heard about it. I think I...

8/8/2009
Shelly
Drs, That is very interesting because I tell my husband...

Open Marriage

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